Joy

 Bringing me joy

Pens

Magazines 

Peanut butter pretzels 

My kindle

Laughter of my niece and nephew 

Pursue

 Grace finds

Me in

The most 

Unexpected ways

And Lord

Seeking 

Your loving 

Face

Is now

The joy 

I’m to

Prayerfully 

Pursue

NC

 Mountain air 

Clear skies 

North Carolina 

Is showing 

How beautiful 

The planet 

Really is

Near

 Lord

I don’t like 

This season 

For the fear

And pain 

Are right 

In my line 

Of sight

The rear view mirror 

Is gone

Is it

Time to

Face the elephant 

I’ve despised 

Since we

Met two

Decades ago

Why are 

The things

Meant to set

You free 

Are so 

Darn odious. 

Lord

I wake up 

Cranky

Like a baby

Who has

Been 

Denied

A bottle

And I 

Go to bed

Unsettled

And my

Only desire 

Is that 

You draw near

 As I battle 

A tumult 

You saw 

Coming 

Old ways

 Finding joy

In an old country tune

That takes 

My soul

Back to beach days

Lathered

In a sunscreen 

That smells

Like the 

Tastiest pina colada

Loneliness

 Following God 

Can be 

The most lonely 

Place 

I’ll ever 

Be

I know 

That if 

Loneliness

Begets 

Holy grace 

I’m right 

Where

I’m needed

Setting the table

 Oh Jesus 

My circumstances 

Were never 

For my

Comfort 

Your glory 

Comes

My need 

To be coddled 

I’m not 

To chase

An idol

That only 

Brings 

A sorrow

You carried 

Because 

My words

Were read

But that’s 

Where it stopped 

The only way 

To get you

To worship 

Me and not 

Your selfish greed 

Was to 

Wreck your dreams 

To give 

You 

Better plans

Mine

42

 It’s my birthday today. And as I’m blessed and privileged to blow out forty-two candles, I realized a few things. 

I didn’t remember how old I was turning. 

As I get older, I realize that when asked what I want I can see that God can be the only deliverer of the few things I truly desire. 

If you want a list:  snail mail. Unexpected surprises. Candles and stickers. 

I’ve only started to find joy, once my inner child was allowed to be. 

Despite the difficulties, the ability to dream wildly is returning. As is my creativity. That is so important for me. 

Thank you for giving me the best gift ever. I think it gets redundant, but you give me your love, support, acceptance and reassurance of my own worth. You celebrate my humanity. My eccentricity. My being. You give me your time. The most valuable commodity to speak life into a person. Searching. Seeking. Hopefully making the world a better place than I found it. I love you. 

Love yourselves and one another. 

Here’s to another 42. 

Regine