When you start to get answers you’ve long sought, it is a relief. It’s not comfortable. The truth rarely is. Getting what you need versus what you want is the season I find myself in. I’m having to trust. And I don’t trust much. I’m learning so much in being uncomfortable. Not that I want to stay here. I want the good stuff. The hard stuff is bending me to a point I’ve not experienced before. How I’m not breaking, I don’t know.
Speaking up for myself and my treatment as a human being is testing my resolve. I’m being told when I speak I go into fight mode immediately. I’m reactive. I’m a live wire ready to be lit. Forty plus years of being a doormat will do that to you.
Some things I’d like to explain, not that I owe it to anyone.
First, it takes time for me to succinctly describe what I need from you
Two, learning to communicate properly is a journey
Three, It always seems like I need to give a life history to get people to care.
Not everyone is me. I can’t expect. Human decency is rare. We teach our children how to make a dollar, but we don’t mold their character.
I don’t need to be liked, but I ask that you respect my right to exist. To live.
I’m not getting my champagne wishes and caviar dreams era. I’m getting the school of hard knocks. I don’t like them, but I must need them.
Happy Friday.
Yesterday was hard. Today is new.
Grateful for some snail mail that arrived that made my whole afternoon.
Happy Friday to you
ReplyDeleteYour words reflect at least some (fortunately not all) of what I have experienced in the past few months. It's so important that we be listened to.
ReplyDeleteYes, communication can be hard, so is the school of hard knocks! But I'm glad you're speaking up for yourself.
ReplyDeleteLife just isn't easy, and we were never promise that rose garden. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteWishing you a better day today! And learning to communicate is a journey...and not an easy one. Hang in there. :D
ReplyDeleteIt's hard sometimes to speak up for ourselves. I've also had to try to learn to do this for myself. God is the best to talk to first.
ReplyDeleteBlessings and hugs,
Betsy
I can hear that you are doing the work. Learning to express what you need. I hope 2026 is a good year for you. And for all of us.
ReplyDeleteThere are times when communication isn't easy.
ReplyDeleteHang in there.
Sending good wishes for a better day for you tomorrow.
All the best Jan
I respect your right to privacy. It is not your duty to share what you want to keep private. I read your poems and, as I am sure others do, relate them to things in my own life.
ReplyDeleteWe are always here to listen to what you do want to share. You are a very brave person.