So I’ve never found myself very interesting. I’m just a human being in need of Grace, but I was asked to share what was in my cart.
So here is what’s in my cart.
Head x Veronica Beard tennis skort
Ascent chocolate protein powder
Colace stool softener
These are not glamorous purchases
Would I rather buy pretty pens, stationery and dresses yes. My wishlist is definitely more fun. You didn’t ask for that though. So we’re sticking to the boring essentials.
What’s in your cart or on your wishlist?
This afternoon on the treadmill I had a moment of sadness. I remember the days when I could walk on it for an hour with no problems. No fear. No worry. Now, don’t ask how long I can last. It’s not even close to an hour. I started to wonder. Wonder what if. I realized quickly that thought wouldn’t serve me. I just shook my head, and continued walking.
I don’t know how long it will take for me to recover physically, but it will be much quicker than my mental recovery. There is no doubt about that assessment. I didn’t understand what my therapist meant the last time I spoke with her. I get it now.
Pray I can forgive myself for something I couldn’t control. Something I never saw coming. The decline was slow, yet rapid in a way I can’t explain. An oxymoron, I understand. To tell you the state of my soul, it feels like my online cart looks like new workout gear, protein powder and supplements. Rinse and repeat.
Coming out of the weeds of denial is a much harder issue to tackle. It’s being tackled, however, because for grief to be dealt with properly; it must be.
I’m learning slowly what it looks like to be my own cheerleader, until then my online cart purchases will be.
Sunday sermons by Rich Villodas @richvillodas
On IG: @jtedscott has posts he calls Sunday sermons. They’re so good.
My two favorite follows lately
My friend FaceTimed me from a favorite stationery store so I could pick out what I wanted.
Another friend sent a text that I’m keeping. It meant that much.
And God He shows up when I least expect it.
What are you grateful for today?
Any Valentine’s Day plans today?
Loving cinnamon raisin bagels
Unexpected gifts
Snail mail
Not having to cook
Coffee
Red and pink
Hearts
Stars and sprinkles
Has me
Dreaming of
A beautifully decorated
And delicious
Cookie cake
For Valentine’s Day
Happy Valentine’s Day to all. Know you are all loved by me. Sending hugs across the miles.
To do today
Compliment someone
Smile more
Pray for people when they’re on my mind
Just be kind
Y’all add any I’m not thinking of please
How may I pray for you today?
Physical therapy is testing me in ways I imagined, and in ways I didn’t. I anticipated the physical toil. I didn’t anticipate how much. I’m worn out each and every time. PT is followed by nap time. Endurance is what I need, I just don’t know how long it will take me not to be so exhausted by it. This is not the biggest adjustment.
My mental health is undergoing an overhaul. Gratitude mixes with frustration way too often. Grateful for an opportunity to get better, yet a frustration that my body deteriorated so badly that I don’t know when it will return.
And I started OT today too.
Do what
You do
Even as
I continue
Not to
Understand
The plan
