Health
Hope
And joy
This new year
May your day
Find you
Abounding in hope
Surrounded in love
With an abundant peace
That permeates
The body
When you think
You’ve learned it all
Is when your soul
Breaks
The well gushes
And you
Let tears
Of happiness
Flood your heart
With a gratitude
So deep
It shatters
All you
Thought
You knew
Good morning. I hope your Christmas was beautiful and full of love. Looking forward with hope and joy.
God
You hear me
You see me
You know
What I need
So lead me
Sovereign Lord
Merry Christmas my friends. May today be one of joy and immeasurable peace. Love you all my friends. Enjoy the day.
Merry Christmas Eve. It’s cold here, but my heart warm. Lord, lead my heart when it frays. Protect me. Love me when I can’t do the same. Thank you for the love you show me everyday through Your children. You all give me the best Christmas present everyday. Your love and support sustains me and keeps these fingers moving. Thank you. Merry Christmas.
How was your weekend my friends. Sending my love out to you all. The holidays can be rough, but I’m here. Love you friends.
Finally getting into the Christmas spirit
It feels wonderful
I’m jingling all
The way home everyday
Happy Monday
Tell me your joys today?
What I do matters
These are not just
Words
But a window
To my soul
God sheds a
New layer
With each new day
I just didn’t know
I was so layered
And complicated
Pray that
I may
Have the strength
To accept my weakness
To relinquish my need
To know
Control
What I can’t
And fully have faith
To trust and obey
It’s me Regine
God what’s my instructions
For today
In the hot shower
It came to me
That water
Is enough to be
Grateful for
The simple
Is so prophetic
It’s a new day
Lord
I’m here
I don’t know how
It will work out
I have to trust you
I don’t understand
That’s not
What you ask
Surrender
Here we go again
Keep moving
Keep it rolling
I can’t get mad
Or just
Let it go
Smile
And remember
Seasons change
And I can adapt
I’m being challenged
To relish silence
Within the stillness
Watching From Scratch With Love, and my soul needed it. To bring me back to the place where dreams came true. Where hope and joy were alive. I was alive. Where I walked in that church, and I felt at home. What I’m saying is I’m having to remember the good in my life. The trip to Cape Cod, sitting on an empty beach at ten in the morning massaging the sand in my fingertips. Picking up broken seashells like pieces of priceless treasure. Right now, I’m the broken seashells. I have to remember I am priceless treasure. I’m weary. I’m tired. I’m humbled by a movie and the way it opened my eyes today
Up early with the chickens
Trying to get the brain going
And see what lands
And I’m wiping sleep
From my eyes
Lord, you provide. You are trying to teach me. You are showing me what surrender is. And for that, I’m in tears. Thank you for loving me my very loving followers. Happy Thanksgiving.
Thank you for all your love. It’s taking all I have not to explode. I don’t want to divulge yet. And I don’t want to act like a grinch, but my soul is taking hits. Please pray for me. Tell me your good news. I need to rejoice in goodness.
I’m seething with anger
Tears streaming down
My cheeks
Smoke billowing
And I’m
Seeing I
Have issues
I’m not in
A good mood
Even if I know
I’m blessed
And should be
Counting my blessings
Thanksgiving week
Let me be
Thankful
Grateful
Full of hope
And expectant joy
And blissful smiles
Good morning from the frosty South
Fire is crackling
Blanket wrapped around
Music playing
And I’m warm inside
Tell me something good?
Favorite Thanksgiving side?
Favorite gift to give?
Do you send out Christmas cards?
What do you want for Christmas?
I’m realizing
That you can’t rush
It happens
When it does
I can’t force
I can only control
My attitude
I’m being equipped
And as much
As I desire
To return
To old habits
Comfort
Is not longer
The aim
If I seek
True contentment
This morning my nephew gave me a gift. One I didn’t know I needed. It’s an appreciation for home. The one you can’t replace. The one you can’t live without. It’s my everyday canvas. One I don’t take time to nourish. It’s the blades of grass that ground my feet and tickle my toes. It’s the wildlife in my backyard that make it home. It’s the place that is always there. While I dream of big cities and glittering, shiny lights, it’s the grass being cut by the tractor in the pasture, where I know God is. I went to the doctor yesterday getting medicine injected into the pump in my abdomen, I felt peace. Peace, it’s coming because I’ve been coming to acceptance. Acceptance that God will provide what I can’t. In this season, thankfulness has a new meaning. Freedom. It’s not Christmas yet, but I’m celebrating like it is.
It’s Your day Lord.
May I give
You
Your
Due praise
For I am
Blessed
By a Presence
That is holy
And beautiful
May I do
Your will
And relinquish
Mine
What are you reading?
What are you eating?
What are you buying?
Any prayer requests?
Any good news?
Almost two months. I didn’t think I’d feel peace. Know peace. It’s there. It helps to have my siblings’ kids to call my own. And love them so much it hurts. I also have accepted that physically my body couldn’t sustain life. And I couldn’t harm my body chasing something not knowing if I truly desired it or if I put pressure on myself to want two kids and a white picket fence. With the husband. I’ve so conditioned myself to conform to standards I couldn’t meet much less exceed. Perfection is a you know what. So some wishes are there, some squashed. I will keep those private, unless you can already read my mind. I’m convinced some of you can. I’m getting to know the real me. Someone I’ve never taken the time to know. Or cared too at all. God said that starts now. And I’m listening. For the first time. Actually listening.
Some days I put pressure on myself to deliver. Deliver words that make a difference. Some days I question my value. Is what I do quantifiable? I know this is flawed thinking. I do it anyway. I do this when I try to have control. I know I don’t have it. I still crave it. I’m in waiting. I’ve had to give up what I wanted because my heart said no. Patience is a virtue. Not one I have. It’s necessary. I don’t ask for it. I’m being allotted it anyone. Being honest sets you free. Vulnerability is coming. I’m tired of holding it all in. You’re not alone. I’m not alone.
Latin beats
Match the Cuban roots
And I’m swaying
Hips groove
Knowing
Our heritage
Never leaves us
My soul smiles
With the rhythm
And rhyme
With the knowledge
That my abuelita
Would laugh
And say
I told you so
The fog lifting
Is my greeting
This warm
November morn
Where possibility
Is just that
Hope is
In abundance
Peace is offered
And love
Is on
The periphery
Just waiting
To make
Its claim
At the center
Of humanity
For where
Love resides
Disdain subsides
Hate ceases
Love encapsulates
Who we can be
When we cease
To be self-absorbed
And defiant
Who I am
Is to be
The outward representation
Of who
He’s always been
Loyal
Dependable
And without
Malicious intent
Love
The command
That doesn’t shift
With prevailing wisdom
I’m fighting my flesh today. Trying now to cower to my own expectation. Worshipping through the anxiety. Having to trust. I don’t understand much, but this I know: God wants all of me. And He will get it. He stripping away the filter. I’m raw. Square one is better with God than polished refinement.
You want it all
I hide
But you
Find me
Every time
Without
Batting an eyelash
Love yourself
It’s the one thing
That makes me shudder
To this day
Let me view
The mirror’s reflection
As proof of Your majesty
God, it’s Monday morning. It’s your child Regine searching for words that escape me. My thoughts reflect the deep seated fog outside. It’s the month of gratitude. I’m needing grace right now from myself to let go and let You do Your work. I have not cut out to figure it all out.
My prayer today
Be an instrument
Of mercy and grace
Where peace
Is granted
To every
Anxious heart
For the love
Of Christ
Warm my bones
Soothe my soul
And grant forgiveness
To your children
Who struggle
To give it
To themselves
Any prayer requests?
In the silence
Of morning
When all
I hear
Are the roaring
Of the
Thoughts
Rolling
In my brain
Hoping
I have words
To convey
What my thoughts
Are making
Me feel
You affirm me every day. It makes me smile. The fact that you look forward to another ten years makes me cry. I hope that I can continue to inspire and make you smile. Thank you for loving me. Now, the only job I have is to love myself as much or more than others love me. I love you all.
This day is about costumes and candy for many, but for me this day ten years ago seems like a blur of nerves and excitement. I will never forget being told to just do it and get out of my head. You need an outlet. Those words started what you read all these years later. Now as for what blogging has taught me is or ten years does is that if you enjoy what you do, it will continue much longer than anticipated. I never thought I’d write this long. I didn’t feel confident that what I would share would matter. I didn’t think it would stick. I still wonder, but you keep coming back. I’m grateful for it. Deep within me, I keep at it, because the stability of my mental state depends on it. I would never believe other writers when they said it themselves, but it’s true. My physical health needs stretching and exercise. My mental health needs writing. When I don’t write for a day, mentally I feel displaced. Every day in which I’m afforded breath, it is my desire to be here. I can only pray you will join me. This is what I was meant to do. Write, love people and have them love me back. I can’t pay you back for all you’ve poured into the vessel that is me, but I’m blessed by it every day. You make me feel rich. Richly loved. Richly blessed. Richly wanted. And oh Lord, it still leaves me shocked that it could feel this beautifully and stunningly sweet and amazing. Thank you. So here’s to another ten.
First of all, I need to say THANK YOU!!! First for knowing how long I’ve been blogging. Second for your wonderful comments. This morning, I saw a friend post that she is requesting prayers for her child. A possible CP diagnosis. I’ve prayed. But, honestly I don’t know how to pray. In all my years, this is the one thing I’ve stopped asking. You don’t know how life will go. Independence. That’s a pipe dream. I have in some ways. Other ways not so much. And I don’t know if I will fully have it. That’s acceptance. I accept that I don’t know, and that’s the only answer I can give you. The one I can give myself. So please pray if you’d like.
I’m coming up on a big day. It’s a blogging anniversary. Nine or ten years. I don’t know. Lost count years ago. It’s my most consistent relationship. What have I learned. I’ve learned that if I don’t meet you, know my love for you is endless. You show up. You love me. You don’t question. You seem willing to absorb my rants and frustrations. You fill a void. You mind the gap. You don’t erase my pain. You help me face it. Why I keep writing. To get out my head. To release agony. Ten years of pain. I’d thought I would have been rid of it all. No. That’s the real answer. Let me honest. My life is damned near perfect. The problem is right between my two ears. I’ve been in therapy long enough to admit that. It’s the voice that’s asks me everyday: Do I dare ask for more? And I don’t know whether it’s right of me to ask God for more. I can’t just believe I’ve written this. In ten years, this is progress. I don’t know how many will read this, but this is about as vulnerable as I’ve ever been. My heart is cracking. It is said one grows, when we break our own darn walls. The dam just burst.
Observations after two surgeries in two months
Stamina is a daily battle
Health is wealth. A true blessing
God provides
Relief is an elixir
I would ask that you grace me with your prayers as my mind and body undergo a revamp. Ten minutes on a treadmill leaves me exhausted. Overhauling the mind, body and soul is a journey. I’m being selfish for the first time in my life to adjust. I’m having to guard my energy. My words have left me. I’m just so glad you continue to show up. Thank you
What are your wins for the week?
What are you making?
What is making you smile?
A random fact about you?
What are you buying?
What are you snacking on?
What is making you smile?
Mine are
Books
Pistachios
Fall colors
Getting ready
For the cold
To set in
The coffee
To bring warmth
And for Nature
To show
How well
Change
Is natural
And a blessing
Apple cider donuts
A side of Prosecco
The mountains
As a backdrop
Red leaves
The garland
Of Autumnal Grace
Those hugs
Of a squealing
Seven year old
And a boy
Who makes
My heart halt
As he climbs
The tree
And all
I can picture
Is Tarzan
Wild
Free
Fearless
And
An example
To their aunt
To seize the day
With gusto and
Reckless abandon
I’m reading a book a night when I can’t sleep
It feels good to be feeling better
The holidays are coming up and I’m excited
Dogs make life better
Sweet
Saucy
Sassy
It’s what happens
When you finally
Unburden yourself
From unrealistic expectations
Learning
That the mirror
Is not my enemy
My mind needs
To be molded
By the Father
Not others
Who don’t know
The real me
I’m getting used to new scars. And it’s freeing. Access to medical care is a blessing. I’m up and moving. If you’d told me that right now, I wouldn’t have believed you. I’m grateful for how God is faithful then, now and forevermore. When God made me, I wondered. The fact that He has kept His promise to provide and protect me leaves me breathless. I’m expensive. And He has continued to say, Not a problem. He loves me so much. Maybe I should do the same.
Be a blessing. The only occupation that has lasting value
My soul awakened today. For the first time, I’m enjoying life.
Change can be hard, but it can be good. Thank you for telling me that tears can be good. I’ve had to let them out to let go of what I can’t handle. I realized physical exhaustion I can handle but mental exhaustion not at all. To be free, I must fully free myself of regret. I went shoe shopping today, and as the sweet manager told me she was 22, I realized at 39 what a gift time is.
Today was a good day. I will take it.
How’s your day?
Leaning into
The love of Christ
Give my spirit
A lift
The eyes
Glisten at
The goodness
Of your Provision
Update
I still have to take a pain pill to sleep at night
I still cry
But
I’m slowly returning. Normal. I can’t say. I have to realize I’ve had two surgeries in two months. As well as I do physically, mentally I’m in the woods. Trying to get out each day, but I still can’t verbalize to the outside world my feelings. Besides you all only my best friend knows the depth of my pain. When people ask, I leave it that my body couldn’t handle bearing children.
I’d ask a favor. Please dont ask a person of faith why they wouldn’t sacrifice their bodies to birth a child. I can’t be fruitful and multiply. Physically it takes every ounce I have to take care of myself. I can’t question God on this anymore. I can’t take away CP. I can’t take away genetics. I can’t risk my life. You love me so well, but just a little thought.
Jackson Browne
And I letting loose
Knowing that today
Is glorious
Because
I’m freer now
Because I actively
Seek a smile
To bring joy
Mentally turning a corner. I have six nephews and a niece who give me joy. I didn’t birth them, but they are mine. Stuck with me. Seeing them last night on FaceTime gave my soul the smile I temporarily shelved. I cry every day. I knew my mood would be all over the place after surgery, but really I had no clue. So I’m getting better even if I go through tissues more often than the feminine products I finally trashed.
Happies today
Tatler magazine
Music
Sitting up
A blessing
After a hospital stay
I had to have some
Female organs
Taken out
For health reasons
I will not be bearing children
A fate I fought
For a year
A year that brought
A pain I won’t explain
My health could no longer
Take the pain
And I had to
Be reassured
My value
Is not tied
To child-bearing
Be kind
Surrender
Is starting
To taste sweeter
Because I’ve let
The tears fall
And acceptance
Become my reality
What have you learned ?
I’m finally
Confronting
What I’ve put off
For decades
To know
Normal
Is not your destiny
But extraordinary
Is available
When you simply
Face fears
That haunt
Your dreams
In some way
Every night
Comfortable
Haven’t known
The feeling
In so long
The growth spurt
Of spiritual maturity
God is tired
Of me
Stuck in
The same place
Day after day
I can’t pretend
I don’t see it
Because my feet
Are no longer
Stagnant
But moving
Because laziness
And doubt
Are no longer
Viable excuses
To evade truth
Like the plague
That ravages minds
With impunity
The exhaustion
On inaction
Is overwhelming
So tackling
The roots
Of malaise
Is underway
Some thoughts today
I’m watching the funeral of the Queen, and something is striking. The meaning of life. To love God, country, and family. And yes the family you didn’t know you had.
To serve dutifully. What a concept.
As I ponder. How well do I serve, how well do I love?
I don’t feel l’ve done it well lately. Praying I can be the servant God wants to see.
Can anyone guess why I love my name today?
Stretching
Always
What I’ve detested most
Because it takes
Patience
Not to slap
The floor
In disgust
Waiting for the signal
For the all clear
Until then
I wait
With baited breath
Peace
Wash over
Like a waterfall
Cleansing all
Impurities
Could you pray for me? It’s painful to disclose right now. Maybe in time, I will be at peace discussing it. The right thing is the hard thing. I know that. My heart knows it. My mind knows it. Doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt. Coming to terms with reality, it’s time. I love you all. You give me strength and purpose to keep sharing. The depth is crushing. Having to trust when I don’t understand.
A cocktail of courage
Whiskey sour
Garnish the heart
With style and substance
That doesn’t fade
As it ages
The violin
And piano
Go together
In perfect harmony
Fear and worry
Are much the same
It is my desire
That I find strength
To let anxiety
Find the door
And stay away
But I know
He uses everything
He can
To break loose
The chains
That enslave
Holding me hostage
To sinful flesh
This weekend I went away, and I learned a few things
Being still will teach more than being in motion. I love feeling small amongst God’s creation.
Community can bring you alive
Being with children brings joy
What have you learned?
I’m unhinged
And I know
It’s because
I’m fearing
Something I
Can’t control
I’m having
To remember
The Father
Has me
When I
Can’t see myself
What are your wins this week?
I’m grateful for the mustard seed. It’s there because progress is being made
The tears fall, and I let them
Renewal is new every morning
Fall apart
Broken
Cracked
Let it all
Out
The only way
To freedom
Lies in truth
Get used to
Uncomfortable
It’s the only
Answer
With any proof
I write
But am rarely ever
Happy with the product
That is produced
That will have
To suffice
Jamming out
In pj’s
Listening to music
Hoping the coffee
Kicks in soon
Have a beautiful day
Love yourself
And each other
Reality
The backwoods of Carolina
Looking out the frame
Of dew and green
Knowing life is sweet
Because of another’s sacrifice
And yet my mind
Woke up in Positano
Dreaming of limoncello
And ocean breezes
Wherever I am
La Dolce Vita reigns
Because God is within me
And I’m surrounded
By friends like you
The rain falls
And I grin
Because
Water is precious
And the Lord
Is providing rest
With every drop
What are you grateful for today?
Today is a new day. Lord, I have the words, but nothing feels right. Your children need you, whether I’m willing to admit it. Surrender is all you wanted, and I’m obliging. Readers, lift up each other. Love you all.
Didn’t get news I wanted at the doctor, but growth is taking in stride. I’m realizing what want is not always best. You don’t get to choose. You just trust. It’s the first time, I didn’t have high blood pressure due to anxiety. Making the choice for peace. I didn’t realize, I consciously surrendered for the first time in my life. It feels good. I will grieve later, but right now, I accept. The psychiatrist was right. The Serenity Prayer. The answer that is true when all else may not be.
God, it’s me, Regine. My mind is all over the place. I know You’re there. I just wonder where I am. Am I stuck in my own malaise, my own fear. I know when I ask questions, I grow. Growing is never an easy process. I’m doing the things right now, I swore I never would. Don’t tell God never. You will end up doing that thing. I ask how your heart is, because I can’t focus on myself anymore. It brings anxiety. Thinking is not a good thing anymore. I must pray and go and do it. I will convince myself to not do the things I must.
So what is really on your heart? Anything you’ve read that’s struck a chord? When you share you story, it reminds me to share mine. The unsavory bits included.
Things about me
Love gelato
Ready for sweater season
Favorite meal is breakfast
Love dogs
Love watching tennis
Your turn?
Friday Five
More snail mail arrived
Looking at fall clothes
Found new stickers
Finished watching a Netflix show
Waiting for the US Open to start
Yours?
What’s on my heart today?
Anxiety rolls in like a wave. I’m remembering Martha’s Vineyard. The boat rocked, the waves crested and crescendoed, and I was stronger for it. I’m thinking God is rocking my boat so I can focus. I’m distracted and in the what ifs. I must be present in the present. So simple yet so true. What are you learning today?
Any prayer requests?
I have a few
Pray for a friend and her recent cancer diagnosis
Pray for healing for a child still hospitalized after an accident
Pray that I may trust God in everything and anything
This is a summer of stillness. I’m having to be quiet. God is well aware of my desires. Trust me. I’m in the season that make you insane or send you running into the arms of the Father. I’m remembering that my way leads to pain, lessons and an inward I told you so. If I’m feeling redundant in my posts, it’s because it’s true. I need to relearn the same things day in and day out. It feels good to just breathe in, and inhale an air of gratitude. I’m having to be grateful in the small things. I overcomplicate simplicity. Overthinking is a day job, mine. The truth is like a prickly thorn, pinching in those spots we try to hide.
I’m getting back to myself, but I must be honest. The physical scar at my abdomen, it hurts to look at, which is strange. That scar enhances my quality of life. No life of wheelchairs and painful contractures. I told the doctor I’ve had this pump almost twenty years. I don’t want to imagine life without it. Who knows if I’d have the strength to blog, to travel, to live a life most like me can only fantasize about. It’s not lost on me. I’m also reminded that physical scars are the evidence of their existence. The ones mentally only I know are there. The physical reminder is one that now fuels my desire to address with truth what holds me back. I will get there. I remember anything worthwhile takes time. My mental health is worthwhile something I didn’t believe. I thought as long my body could be dealt with my mental state would magically heal. Pure folly. I now know better. I’m good at hiding. Gold medal performances that led to torture. I’m listening to this song now about control. I happen upon its arrival every day. God shows up even when I don’t seek Him outwardly. I hear the song, and His appearance is near. He knows I need Him. I’m so tired of being dependent, but God says you are. It’s not something to shrink from. It’s not a bad thing. It’s raw and true. The perfect combination that makes a great follower of mine. Accept the gift. The surgeon split you wide open and put you back together again. I’m about to do that to your broken soul. I do my best work with shattered shards.
I’m having to take it moment by tiny moment. I have to remind myself that physical and emotional healing takes time. I’m making strides, but i have to remember to slow down. I get easily tired. That’s okay. I’m having to accept and live in denial. Truth, the only rubric that matters. Progress is not linear. I accept the disability. The fear it brings. I don’t like it. It’s there. It’s a daily reminder to keep it forward. The only thing looking back does is remind me of what could have been. I don’t live there. Thank you for reading what my soul feels.
I’m finally starting to get back to myself. Still taking it easy. Thank you all. I never want to take for granted the blessings that you bestow on me whether I’m knowing of them or not.
Thank you
If I’m being honest, I’m ready to be better. I’ve slept more than usual. Showering feels herculean. I know I need rest, but I’m getting restless. I shouldn’t complain. Tell me your wins.
I had surgery yesterday to replace the baclofen pump with a new one. It was more intensive than I thought. I have a two week recovery. I may blog, but I may not comment as much. Thank you for your support
Thank you friends for your wisdom and support. Thank you for your love. I would ask for your prayers today and in the next few days. Thank you. God Bless. Regine
Lord, you see my tears, my anxiety. You say lay it down. I will guard you, love you and make it right. Stop trying. Just believe. Trust me. I’m not going anywhere. Release. Breathe and know I’m where you are.
What is on your mind today? Your heart? Your soul?
I’m just having to breathe in. Release. Pray. And let it all go.
I will Praise
And have faith
That all my desires
Will become reality
Bless all the ones
I call my own
And guard their
Hearts and minds
In Christ Jesus
Like the mountain
Whistling the treetops
The lightning snapping
The branches
I’m seeing
That time
Is a truth teller
No matter
What humans
Believe
This weekend I went on more hikes than I have in a very long time. I learned some lessons. God’s world will make you feel small, and I didn’t mind it. I had to push through mental blocks and physical exhaustion. It’s been a long time since I’ve showered in sweat. When I completed these tests, I felt like I conquered the world. In a way I did. My body held and so did my spirit. No small feat. I had to take small steps. I was forced to stop thinking and just move. This weekend proved that I’m more than able.
I’ve been around my niece and nephews for a bit which means this space took a rest, but what didn’t is what these humans teach me. Whether it’s to sing show tunes at the top of my lungs, or get in the floor and retrieve toys so many times, it is a humbling experience. I’m exhausted, but forever changed by little hands and sweet voices. I do lose my mind and yell sometimes. Then I’m reminded of how many times God gives me what I need to give them: grace. It all starts there. A few days in the mountains gave me something I forgot I had: preserverance.
I’m staring at a screen waiting to be filled with something masterful. As I hit each key, I realize this. Writing is about the absence of perfection. It’s the raw and unfiltered. The one without polish. It’s about returning to roots. The deep ones that hold pain and promise. It’s letting you see a soul as calloused as my toes. It’s about learning from anything or anyone that crosses the path. It’s about showing weakness so that strength may become a necessary antidote. I have become stubborn, and not in a good way. It’s about learning from a six year old, not arguing about nonsense. I’ve loved Philippians 4:13, but I haven’t let it make roots. I can recite it, but do I believe it. Honesty, the policy, I haven’t honored in a long time.
Yesterday my niece was over, and it never ceases to amazes me the wisdom of children. Playing tic tac toe, she says “you can’t keep doing the same thing if you want to win”. I didn’t even realize it. Her words stuck with me. How often in life do I do the same things just to not lose. At six and a half, my niece gave me advice I will keep forever. I want to remember that you can be taught by anyone at anytime. Who knew a rainy summer Sunday is when I would receive such gifts. Thank you Lord for the children who remind me of life lessons we adults seem to forget.
What have children taught you?
I love collecting seashells
I have a sweet tooth
I love to shop
Buying books is my weakness
Traveling soothes my soul
Tell me something about you
Wins for today
A new day
A juicy peach
A word search
My soul is breathing easier today. I am grateful.
Share yours?
Rain
Where
I learn to retain
The heart
Soul and mind
To align
To where harmony sings
And the world
Utters its pure delight
The window of the soul
Is the mountain peaks
The ocean waves
The skunks
The birds
Babies
And every joy
That comes
My way
Like an aperol spritz
Have the spirit of a child
The imagination
The wonder
That’s on my heart today
I’m having to let go
Of everything
I once held dear
Look out the window
Put down the phone
Grateful for no cell service
In remote parts
Tell me about your gratitude
In my deep exhales, as I erase the fears creeping up, I remember the promise. The promise that says every day I am here. I don’t make myself known. I’m in the shadows. I’m watching and waiting to see when and where I fit. I fill your cup as needed. I’m on the unsteady, choppy waters. I’m in the waiting room. I’m in the food you eat, the water you drink. I’m in the trips you take and the decisions you make.
In the world
I May be dismayed
But with You
At the helm
I’m restored
For with faith
Earth bows
Down to its Maker
Enjoy the day
In such a way
That a smile
Is a mile wide
And joy radiates
Upward and forevermore
Cuddles on the couch
With the pooch
As I sip my
Delicious brew
And a tomato
Sandwich awaits
Me later
Favorite inspirational quotes?
Favorite words of wisdom from friends or family?
Share with me
Soft sand
Drink in hand
Birds chirping
Dogs running
And all I do
Is enjoy
My seat
Watching
All the action
In Your Prescient and Providential nature, I start a new journey. I will look for the opportunity to learn and to trust. My soul rests in the knowledge of who You are, not in who I am. As I rest my heart and exhale. I let go. Hold me. Surprise my sensibilities. Change is not to be feared, embrace it. Riding the waves of fear that release the freedom to believe. Activate the faith of the forefathers. My spirit rises to meet the moment.
2 Timothy 1:7
What did vacation teach me?
I’m being taught that waiting is a worthwhile pursuit. I’m learning that people want to connect. They want to help you. They will see your heart. They want to love you. Let them. I’m learning that I’m more than capable. My heart loved Nantucket, my soul was Martha, my mind a Hyannis. What troubled my heart at the time becomes the memory I most treasure. I miss riding the ferry everyday. It gave my mind and body two hours of forced rest just watching the ocean. I’m still pinching myself. God is good even when I am not. Nature is the only salve that always reminds me of where I stand.
The waves
Lull me
Into a slumber
Until waves
Lash the
Jetty rocks
Woods Hole
The ferry
Trying to hold
It’s own
As this human
Begged for
Ginger ale
My vacation was one I will never forget. It amazes me that last week I was on Cape Cod, Nantucket and Martha’s Vineyard. The location was pure fairy tale even when life isn’t. I kept telling myself to be pinched. I couldn’t believe this was my reality. I’ve come back with plenty of seashells and sand in my purse that I don’t want to clean out. I’ve eaten more lobster in every form. Every bite left me to imagine if my fantasy matched the reality. As I took in God’s creation, my breath got caught, my eyes amazed. The teal and turquoise waters crashing against golden sand will be etched forevermore. With each step, I fell in love with the Creator who exceeds my expectation, and says look. My soul rejoiced when my mind could not. I will say that on vacation, anxiety, still visited me. I needed to feel that ocean air, soft sand, massage those seashells to realign. Different locations teach different lessons, but they all come back with the same message. God is everywhere and in everything.
Back from Cape Cod
Ate more lobster
Than one should
Rode more ferries
Walked beaches
And saw
God’s creation
Putting on a show
Thank you for all the concern shown. I took a week off for vacation. I’m back. I’m tired, but very happy. I’m full of contentment. How are you all? I missed you. Fill me in. Regine
Let it go
Three words
I don’t like
Because it signifies
The thing
I want most
Is the one
Thing
I can’t have
The power
Is within me
To worry
Or praise
God is faithful
My faith
Needs actions
Not words
Challenging myself
To find the beauty
Where it is
All around me
Tell me your wins for the day
Picked vegetable
Well water tastes so good
So many pen pals.
Your turn
Brought to tears
To know
I’ve never
Met you
But you
Love me
In a way
That moves me
That you desire
For my dreams
To be realized
And for hope
To spring eternal
You humble me
Leave me wondering
If how you love me
Is how God
Wants us to
Love each other
I’m having to trust
Trust His Goodness
Trust when the anxiety
Sets in
Trust His Will
Is better than mine
Enjoy the day
Not wish it away
Knowing when
To stop fighting
And surrender
Any prayer requests?
It’s early morn
The music plays
As I string
Along a thought
Hoping it resonates
Dreams
Keep me ticking
Keep me going
When I want
To quit
The desires
Of my heart
Defy gravity
And a constellation’s
Shine
Happy Monday my friends.
On my mind
This morning
I need to practice
Positive thinking
And being content
In every circumstance
God
Renew
My mind
Purify my heart
Cleanse me
And let
Your Will prevail
It’s the Lord’s Day
You are to be revered
Glorified and Praise
Tell me your wins for the week
What made you smile
Made you think
Hit the ground
Praise God
And say
Amen
I am recovering slowly. In addition to hurting myself, I had to increase the amount of medication I was receiving. It’s an adjustment. I’m glad to have a choice. It’s an honor to get older. I never want to forget that. It is a privilege to learn. It’s a pain to wait, but if that’s the price, I will pay it. God Bless you all.
Regine
Acceptance is love
Love is acceptance
And once
It builds roots
It frees the soul
To move
The heart
To breathe
Yesterday
At my pump refill
I got instructions
Slow down
I hurt myself recently
Trying to run
To get the door
And if I heard
Many times
They can wait
You’re straining your body
And not bouncing back
Accept the limitations
I’m not superhuman
I’m Regine
And that will
Have to do
If I don’t visit you all
I’m sorry
Sitting for too long
Is painful right now
I’m not admitting losses
I’m just acknowledging
The truth I’ve always known
But chose to subvert
It’s my
Mom’s birthday
Today
Could you all
Say Happy birthday
She said
She wanted nothing
Being alive
Is more than adequate
Honest post here.
Envy
Those four letters
Give me pause
An anxiety
For I suffer
From it
Started at sixteen
Medically unable
To drive
Now to social media
Seeing the destinations
That capture my imagination
And I’ve not seen yet
I know I’m in
A waiting season
And I’m having
To trust
What I don’t understand
About myself
I’m no longer
Seeking the answer
I just want to learn
What I was too stubborn
To do
Long ago
Honoring your sacrifice today. Thank you is never enough.
Some pieces of my heart came to visit this weekend. While I don’t have children of my own, I claim my nephews and niece as my own. They are a true joy. Before they and their parents left we took a little trip to the North Carolina mountains for lunch in Saluda, NC. There is something about an old-timey Main Street that makes my heart smile.
Mountains
Bring the
Cool breeze
And majesty
That makes
You put
The phone down
Embrace
The curves
In the road
And cherish
Ordinary moments
What is on your heart?
What is making you smile?
What are you reading?
The children. The faces are etched in my soul forever. Search your souls. Jesus loves the children. He states it plainly. Search your motives.
A good book. Fresh fruit. Snail mail. Unexpected gifts. Each day is an unexpected gift. I make plans, and God just shakes His head. You all make me smile. The way you love me is so extraordinary. Thank you.
I’m reading Jayci Lee’s books. They are some of my favorites. She’s an AAPI author. I can’t say this enough. Get to know others different than yourself. You’ll be forever changed for the better.
Blessings and love one another today.
Regine
I have no words today.
Look upon us Lord
Grant me peace
Where there is
No understanding
Search your hearts
Your souls
Dig deep
Because today
It is a privilege
To be alive
The laughter
Ringing through
Echoing
Sending the shivers
Of giddy delight
Must be
Summer
Longer nights
To bathe
In Nature’s
Glory
Swinging from the rooftops
Singing from the treetops
May the light
Shine through
That darkness
Tries
To cloud
What is making you smile?
Any wins this week?
What are you reading?
What are you making?
What are you baking?
My poodle
Finding a bathing suit
Asian authors
A victory journal
Nothing at the moment
I’m struggling with discipline
To eat right
To read my Bible
With conviction
And fervor
That I give my phone
Please pray
What are you reading?
What are you sending?
What are you ordering?
What are you thinking?
What is bringing you joy?
I must forgive myself
To free myself
From a shame
I don’t deserve
I’m reclaiming
The promise
Of Jesus
Who came
To replace
The perfectionist
That resides in me
Quiet my mind
Still the soul
Replace fear
Of mistakes
And rejection
With pride
For conquering
Not retreating
Just sitting in silence
Remembering when
To fight
When to stop
When to meditate
Leave it in prayer
For when
I don’t understand
I get mad
And anger
Is an emotion
That leaves
Me in disarray
I’m coming undone
Knowing what worked
Years ago
Doesn’t cut it now
I still see injustice
But I can’t let others pain
Destroy my peace
I’m to pray
Do what I can
And leave it
In hands
More capable
Than my own
My mental state
On a razor’s edge
On a wave
On the shores
Of Oahu
Riding atop
The white caps
Basking on the highs
Of nature’s beauty
I want to be grateful
No matter the fact
That I’m befuddled
Most of the time
They only thing
I know
Is that I’m His
And for today
That’s enough
Love the life
You have
In war torn nations
Quiet is a blessing
Each of you readers whether you comment or not give me peace, perspective and purpose. Thank you for sharing your lives and hopes with me. I hope this day gives you all that you need of it. Be kind. Be loving. Be you. Sending love your way if you need it. Blessing my friends.
Regine
Any prayer requests today? I haven’t done one in awhile. I hope this day finds you healthy and happy. Blessings my friends.
What I’m reading- Books by Jayci Lee. Highly recommend
What I’m eating- Pineapple smoothies
What I’m ordering- Vitamins
What I’m doing- Writing pen pals
What I’m watching- the news
Your turn?
Grateful for you Lord
Grateful for long walks
Grateful for all of you
Tell me your joys for the week
What are you making?
What is your favorite easy healthy meal to make?
What are you reading?
What is on your heart?
As I sit here, I was reminded of someone’s words yesterday. My gift is not for my benefit. It’s for others. It’s for His glory. These past few weeks have been anything but stellar. I’m realizing I still need help, whether I want it or not. This has been one of the hardest things to accept. When the world preaches independence, I let myself fall into the trap. I’m not normal. Never will be. This hurts my pride like no other, but in order to grow…. The pride got kicked to the curb in embarrassing fashion, and help is a necessity. Whether my writing still is the gift God intended, I can only hope. If you will humble me with your prayer, I’d be grateful.
I contemplated not posting. I’m under the weather. Ricola and I are in a relationship this week. My mind has been working overtime and not in a good way. I need prayers that my pride doesn’t impede progress. Trying to do it all myself is having unnecessary consequences. There is no eloquence. Just raw and unfiltered
What is making you smile?
What’s for breakfast?
What is on your mind?
What are you reading?
What have you ordered lately?
Jesus
As I remember
Your sacrifice
Please rid me
Of anger
And bitterness
Grant me
Protection
And Your
Peace
What is making you smile?
Tell me a win for you?
Tell me something people don’t know about you?
Lean in the blessing
Of unexpected joy
That prayers
Get answered
When relief
Is the aim
Not my vanity
With all the sadness and uncertainty in the world tell me your list of good things.
Found a new flavor of ice cream
Got a haircut
Reading a new book
My life
Should be
A proclamation
Of what this
Holy Week
Exemplifies
In Your Word
The sinner
Is forgiven
And life
Is lived
With divine purpose
And grace
That is
Given freely
Every day
Let my worship
Be one
That glorifies
You
Not
My own selfish ambition
Saturday’s questions
What is your favorite vacation? Domestic and international
What is your latest order?
What is your latest find?
Favorite charity?
Favorite authors?
My answers
Newport RI and Assisi Italy
Groceries
Weetabix. I’m hooked
World Central Kitchen and Nova Ukraine
Jennifer Loy and Jenny Proctor
Your turn
Rainy days
Are not
My favorite
But they
Bring
My favorites
The blooming gardenias
And pink azaleas
And help
Boom the height
Of the mighty sunflower
In my soul
In my heart
In my mind
Even when
I don’t think
You are
You are
And for that
A thousand thanks
Are never enough
Three things of gratitude
The gift Lord of what you provide
The yellow and blue who show me how to live
The dog whose love doesn’t fail
Declaring life abundant
For myself and those
I love
God grant us all life
In Your never ending grace
May I focus
On the goodness
You envelope
And surround me in
Everything
Name three great things from your weekend?
What are you reading?
What are you cooking?
What are you baking?
Something that makes you smile?
Favorite new find?