Thursday, September 25, 2014

I'm struggling

im struggling folks. I want perfection.  I'm embarrassed. It difficult to even write a blog post. My will has taken over. I'm trying to fix me.
I have to go back to wearing leg braces. I'm finally letting myself acknowledge the pain. Have I let my body down. Have I let myself. Did I get lazy, complacent thinking I had defeated CP.  I can't typr the word. Denial, I know.
I'm in pain.   Right now, I am questioning writing such a scathing post.   Looking at this realistically has kept me from letting myself feel the pain.
Finally letting the tears fall.


  1. Your honest.....I am using a walker now...I get scared at times how I will take care of myself now that I am aging if I lose my Frank. Regine years ago when i was young like you i felt the same way...but over time I chose not to be a victim of polio...I learned to not think about what I can not change. It is a process with up and down days...but it works. Do not be hard on yourself for your feelings. (((HUGS)))...sorry this is happening to you and to me. too :( Become strong in Christ. ♥

  2. This is my favorite verse - Psalm 46:5....God is within her; she will not be toppled.

    That's straight from God's Word for your beautiful ears. Do not ever be ashamed to have feelings. You are human and it is good to be honest. It helps you.

    The other day I heard someone say, "God is big enough for the truth." Cry out to Him, tell Him your pain, fears, angers, and struggles. He will hold you through your tears sweet lady. I'm praying for you.

  3. I don't think there is anything wrong in how you feel. The problem is letting it dictate your actions. I am confident you will meet this challenge.