Thursday, March 2, 2017
Cerebral Palsy
I didn't want to talk about Cerebral Palsy because I didn't want to deal with it. The pain, the agony, the shame over not having acceptance over what I have never been able to control. I didn't think people would love me because I couldn't love myself. I struggle with accepting love because I question its authenticity. I didn't want to accept the elephant in the room. As much as I said I did, I didn't. I wanted from people what I was unwilling to give myself. Truth, the one thing that doesn't lie. The scars one sees are not the bad ones. I want to trust, to love and let Truth guide me.
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I can understand your questioning the authenticity of others love toward you because we live in a world that often says one thing but means another. God will help you as you pray to be able to trust, love and be led by Truth, Regine. I've been praying for you every day. xx
ReplyDeleteOne of my sons best friends growing up has cp also. It is funny because we never saw his disability. We just saw this handsome, brilliant kid who was great to be around. They are not as close as they once were, but college seems to be the time people drift apart. (Especially since they are going to schools in different states and are rarely in town at the same time)
ReplyDeleteOne day I need to tell you our favorite story about their friendship.
I know it is hard to accept, but honestly most people don't see it beyond the first time they meet you. At least I know I didn't with Tyler and I don't think I am unusual.
Always love yourself Regine. I've known people with Cerebral Palsy that think that nobody will accept them and who always have the impression that they are unloved when in fact it's the absolute opposite. Don't let something like that taint your happiness and confidence; if people that you know and love judge you, they were never worth it anyway. My prayers at church are out for you Regine, may God bless you.
ReplyDeleteLots of love,
Marina Rosie xx
http://marinawriteslife.blogspot.fr/
Illnesses can be very hard on us. That can make us feel isolated from others. You're right with what you say- we need to accept ourselves first, then excepting and trusting others becomes easier. I'm sending you positive vibes.
ReplyDeleteWishing the best! xx
ReplyDeleteCoco and Jeans by Marisa x My Instagram x My Bloglovin
I get this....and in my lowest, I remind myself I have a God who fights for me. I practice my faith until I have faith. Sometimes I need to do it minute by minute. I will pray for you right now.
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