Happy for the US yet sad for Canada. I love you both.
Looking at different fashion magazines for inspiration. Love Porter and Tatler particularly. Vogue and Town and Country come next. I love travel magazines too.
Happy baseball season is back.
Enjoyed some chili for lunch.
Tell me one win for you from this week?
PT and OT are working.
What are your favorite healthy snacks? In a food rut.
Love your neighbor and yourself.
About to post on rkrsrue.blogspot.com. Stop by if you could
What’s on the agenda today my friends?
Going to relax after having PT and OT back to back yesterday, and enjoy listening to the rain. I may to some dot to dots or word searches or read a book. A boring weekend. I need boring though.
Have a beautiful weekend.
Friday happies
Happy mail arrived
I woke up
My family is well
Two delicious dinners out
Legs are being strengthened
Your turn
Thank you so much for your love. I don’t deserve it. I’m humbled by it. You see my heart for what it is, even when my sinful desires take hold. The way you love me is what Jesus preached. I have accepted that my body will not be healed like I once prayed. God knows if He cured me, I might think I didn’t need Him or want Him. As I am, I’m constantly reminded of my need for Him, but mostly my want for Him. And that’s what He wants most from me. And I serve at His pleasure, not my own.
He’s taking me through valleys I never thought I’d touch again. I’ve touched them, however. I’ve resided there. There is purpose in the pain. Purpose in the process. If I’ve written these words before, it’s because I have. And they still are true. The years that pass don’t nullify their validity. It amplifies them. I’m a human being who sometimes wants things too easily or right now. I’m imperfect. I accept that I will not be everyone’s cup of tea. I have champagne taste on a beer budget. Do I wish I didn’t. Sure do. That’s God’s job to convict me of. If He uses another human being to do it, who I am to question.
This is not directed at anyone. These are the random thoughts of my heart. I’ve tried to change my heart, but He hasn’t done that yet either. I’m also learning that if I don’t ask, I don’t receive. Do I expect it, no, but if I don’t ask I will never know. And I’ve lived with enough regret for a lifetime questioning my worth. And I refuse to do it any longer.
Peace, hope and love my friends
Regine
Good morning friends. If yesterday’s post left a sour taste in anyone’s mouth, I’m very sorry. I will do better. I don’t want anyone to feel any obligation to me in any way.
Sometimes, I make mistakes, and seek forgiveness. I’m very sorry.
Sending love
Your way
And hoping
For grace
As I learn
And continue
To do so
Every day
Just came home from another procedure. Let me tell you, procedures don’t get easier. My body is not normal. If I already didn’t know it before, the narrative just got reinforced. I have some new products to possibly consider trying. The health and wellness space in the market are having a field day in my online shopping cart these days. I’m having to read reviews for the best product for my needs. On a lighter note, I’m off to rest. I must say you all were right on target with what you’d send me, but Sheri at Red Rose Alley really has me pegged. I’d love to see what you’d pick for me, if you actually sent something. Wishing you a beautiful afternoon.
Love,
Regine
It’s Ash Wednesday. A time of quiet reflection. Of what in me needs to be more like Him. What am I giving up this Lenten season. Self-doubt would be wonderful.
Now for a fun question
If you were to send me snail mail or a surprise based on what you know about me, what would you send? No need to send anything, just curious to see your responses.
Sending love your way
Who knew the contents of my online shopping cart would be a hit. I guess it will become a regular post.
Some tidbits about me
My love of unexpected surprises knows no bounds
Snail mail is a love language
I collect lip products. Same for nail polish
I love word searches
I use cream in my coffee. Vanilla preferably.
So I’ve never found myself very interesting. I’m just a human being in need of Grace, but I was asked to share what was in my cart.
So here is what’s in my cart.
Head x Veronica Beard tennis skort
Ascent chocolate protein powder
Colace stool softener
These are not glamorous purchases
Would I rather buy pretty pens, stationery and dresses yes. My wishlist is definitely more fun. You didn’t ask for that though. So we’re sticking to the boring essentials.
What’s in your cart or on your wishlist?
This afternoon on the treadmill I had a moment of sadness. I remember the days when I could walk on it for an hour with no problems. No fear. No worry. Now, don’t ask how long I can last. It’s not even close to an hour. I started to wonder. Wonder what if. I realized quickly that thought wouldn’t serve me. I just shook my head, and continued walking.
I don’t know how long it will take for me to recover physically, but it will be much quicker than my mental recovery. There is no doubt about that assessment. I didn’t understand what my therapist meant the last time I spoke with her. I get it now.
Pray I can forgive myself for something I couldn’t control. Something I never saw coming. The decline was slow, yet rapid in a way I can’t explain. An oxymoron, I understand. To tell you the state of my soul, it feels like my online cart looks like new workout gear, protein powder and supplements. Rinse and repeat.
Coming out of the weeds of denial is a much harder issue to tackle. It’s being tackled, however, because for grief to be dealt with properly; it must be.
I’m learning slowly what it looks like to be my own cheerleader, until then my online cart purchases will be.
Sunday sermons by Rich Villodas @richvillodas
On IG: @jtedscott has posts he calls Sunday sermons. They’re so good.
My two favorite follows lately
My friend FaceTimed me from a favorite stationery store so I could pick out what I wanted.
Another friend sent a text that I’m keeping. It meant that much.
And God He shows up when I least expect it.
What are you grateful for today?
Any Valentine’s Day plans today?
Loving cinnamon raisin bagels
Unexpected gifts
Snail mail
Not having to cook
Coffee
Red and pink
Hearts
Stars and sprinkles
Has me
Dreaming of
A beautifully decorated
And delicious
Cookie cake
For Valentine’s Day
Happy Valentine’s Day to all. Know you are all loved by me. Sending hugs across the miles.
To do today
Compliment someone
Smile more
Pray for people when they’re on my mind
Just be kind
Y’all add any I’m not thinking of please
How may I pray for you today?
Physical therapy is testing me in ways I imagined, and in ways I didn’t. I anticipated the physical toil. I didn’t anticipate how much. I’m worn out each and every time. PT is followed by nap time. Endurance is what I need, I just don’t know how long it will take me not to be so exhausted by it. This is not the biggest adjustment.
My mental health is undergoing an overhaul. Gratitude mixes with frustration way too often. Grateful for an opportunity to get better, yet a frustration that my body deteriorated so badly that I don’t know when it will return.
And I started OT today too.
Do what
You do
Even as
I continue
Not to
Understand
The plan
Will be giving a PT update soon.
Some wins
Seeing some friends yesterday
A nice lunch out
An unexpected sweet treat
Admiring beautiful craftsmanship in local stores
Tell me yours.
Questions
Did you watch the Super Bowl
Did you make a feast?
Did you watch the halftime?
What is making you smile?
Instagram handle?
Yes
Chicken wings
Yes
Learning God loves surprising me
@reginekarpel
Loving
Jesus
Online shopping
Italy
Avocados
Diet Sprite. Even if I shouldn’t. Don’t drink it often
Dreaming about
A Cortina peak
Covered in snow
As I enjoy
An aperitif
At the foot
Of the Dolomites
Staying sane
Is of utmost importance
These days
And my soul rejoices
In simple pleasures
Until my body
Is ready for
A dreamy adventure
Friday thoughts
Therapy again today. May my spirit rejoice and be glad in it. My wallet may not be full, but my heart is. He’s never cared about dollars and cents, but with my heart. My heart has been on a roller coaster full of what ifs and regret. Wondering if at 42, I let opportunities go, thinking I had time. Right now, I’m getting better, but at a much slower rate. I have to trust, that all I’ve done past and present, He knew would happen. And He’s not surprised, even if I recoil in shock. I have to trust the Author. I just know I’m not Him.
I love you all if you didn’t know.
Regine
Breathing out
Exhaling
As I
Realize
That nothing
Is hidden
From you
Even as
I try to hide
Less of me
More of you
Seems so simple
Yet its execution
Is beyond me
Right now
Flawed
And taking
The time
To do
The hard work
Which is
To look within
At self
Not at others
Externally
My soul is yours
I just never
Really ceded authority
And I’m not
The Author
And finisher of
My faith
Loving
Trying new hair products’
Cherry chapstick
Thrifting
Seeing old friends
Eating good food
Your turn?
Yesterday in therapy was a challenging day. Let’s just say working on my balance left me highly inbalanced. And it didn’t feel too good. I saw old apparatus and equipment that left me shaking inside. I was conquering the fear in real time. My fear was not hidden. My face showed it all. My discomfort and my fear were on full display. I will say that the others in the office watch me with great awe or craziness. Who pays people to whip them into shape like this. I sometimes wonder if sometimes I’ve lost my mind.
Please pray that I can stay the course, as I continue to be very uncomfortable, with no end in sight.
Love you all
Regine
Every day
I’m returning
To a version
I recognize
Yet still is
So foreign to me
I’m letting
The disappointment
Roll off me
I’m doing
The things
That petrify me
I’m finding joy
In places
Formerly marked
With disdain
I’m not taking
On unnecessary pain
Taking on discomfort
Is not a
Badge of honor
Unless he
Ordains it
Or allows it
I’m fully aware
That my problems
Will never cease
I just no longer
Give them
The power
To overwhelm me
To topple me
I’m strong
Yet very fragile
I’m the contradiction
The exception
To every rule
And there
Is grace
In accepting
What was once
So vehemently
Denied
Denial
The river
In Egypt
No longer
Resides there
God says move
This isn’t your home
Not anymore
Anyway
Lord Jesus
Focus on You
Not on worldly
Desires and wishes
May me heart
Be warmed
By your faithfulness
Not the deception
Of man’s crudeness
Be mine
Be ever mine
Lord,
Guard my tongue
Guard my heart
It really needs it
As much as
I need air
My Sunday prayer
