Lord,
It’s me. The weekly sessions continue. I don’t see them stopping. I’m learning hard lessons. I don’t know what to say anymore. Maybe that’s the point. Silence is an action, I need to partake in. It’s in silence, my focus is shifted in the only direction necessary: Yours.
I need to run my own race. As much as I desire the journeys of others, You do not. Maybe it’s not Cerebral Palsy I need to accept. I need to accept the journey I’m on. Maybe it’s not to be well known, but to make You know. Riches and fame dwindle, but You do not ever decrease.
I hate to write these words, but envy is the one sin I fight daily. And I will continue to fight it, until I can release it. I’m not proud of it, but to eradicate it, I must admit its presence.
Lord
Have you way
So that mine
No longer
Strangles me
From
The inside out
I can imagine that with cerebral palsy you always feel a certain amount of envy towards people who can lead a more active life. But I think it helps against envy to look very closely. If you look closely, other people also have deficits, but they are often not noticeable at first glance. The happiest people are those who manage to rest within themselves, and THAT can be done in EVERY body.
ReplyDeleteAll the best, Traude
🌺🪶🍂 🪶🌺
https://rostrose.blogspot.com/2023/09/mamuz-im-schloss-asparn-40000-jahre.html
This was so beautifully written and spoken from the heart. I like what your friend Rostrose said above...she makes a very good point that everyone has some kind of "deficit", but not always visible on the outside. We each have things we struggle with that can be just as debilitating as Cerebral Palsy if we allow it to dominate our minds and lives. For some people it is addictions to things like medications and alcohol, or even food, or things of the mind. Many are trapped by fear and anxiety. You are blessed in that you know to Whom to go with your struggles and burdens. You know that God is there for you, and He's always ready to carry your burdens for you. Many do not know this, and so they continue to struggle with no hope of any kind of cure. Thank you for sharing your heart with us. You are a blessing and an inspiration to us all.
ReplyDeleteBig healing hugs, Regine. ♥
ReplyDeleteLots of wisdom in this post!
ReplyDeleteIn his sermon last Sunday, our pastor talked about the importance of identifying and naming our sins in order to ask for sincere forgiveness. I think you've done that beautifully here, Regine. Blessings!
ReplyDeleteWe all have our struggles, even those who seem to have it all. Don't forget that you're stronger than you think you are and the fact that you have so much clarity and wisdom puts you ahead of many already. Always rooting for you dear Regine <3 Thank you for your kind words!
ReplyDeleteWhy is it so hard to give up what we want and seek what God wants for us instead? For me it's a daily struggle.
ReplyDeleteSending you strength
ReplyDelete...learn those hard lessons one at a time.
ReplyDeleteHugs and prayers Regine as you walk this journey day by day
ReplyDeleteBlessings
Maxine
(((HUGS)))
ReplyDeleteI am praying for you, Regine. It is when we suffer that the Lord is closest to us, sharing our pain and comforting us with His love and caring. We may not know it, we may not "feel" it; but He is there providing "healing" for our soul.
ReplyDeleteDo not be concerned about envy. You are an example to all of us, and honoured in our prayers.
God bless.
Sorry to hear you are struggling. I hope you find some peace and acceptance.
ReplyDeleteThat must not be an easy struggle well everyone has an envy experience in their life but when it overtakes you is evil. May the Lord reassure you that everyone has a story and your story is unique and beautiful too.
ReplyDeleteSuch beautiful and wonderful wisdom my sweet friend. He works to conform His children into the image of His son Jesus!
ReplyDeleteYou're right about running our own race. I only see envy as a sin when it consumes. Then it can get a little dicey, when it rents too much space in your head.
ReplyDelete