Thursday, November 10, 2022

Eschuca

 Almost two months. I didn’t think I’d feel peace. Know peace. It’s there. It helps to have my siblings’ kids to call my own. And love them so much it hurts. I also have accepted that physically my body couldn’t sustain life. And I couldn’t harm my body chasing something not knowing if I truly desired it or if I put pressure on myself to want two kids and a white picket fence. With the husband. I’ve so conditioned myself to conform to standards I couldn’t meet much less exceed. Perfection is a you know what. So some wishes are there, some squashed. I will keep those private, unless you can already read my mind. I’m convinced some of you can. I’m getting to know the real me. Someone I’ve never taken the time to know. Or cared too at all. God said that starts now. And I’m listening. For the first time. Actually listening. 

20 comments:

  1. Dearest Regine,
    Do you mean Escucha=Listen to me in Spanish?
    What are standards?
    IF we manage to accept life as it comes and learn to see the little miracles in each day that God grants us to be alive—that is happiness.
    Perfection exists maybe later—in heaven but NOT in this world; no matter what.
    Hugs,
    Mariette

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  2. You are staying strong in yourself. That is good. We have 4 children, 2 are adopted, I feel no difference. Love comes in the first time you hold them and look in their eyes. Bless you.

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  3. Listening--is the starting line.

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  4. É de elogiar quem sabe ouvir.
    Cumprimentos poéticos

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  5. You've come a long way. Good for you.

    Have a fabulous day, Regine. ♥

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  6. I like "I'm getting to know the real me!" I need to find that. ((Hugs))

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  7. And don't stop listening to God's still small voice!

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  8. Life can be difficult at times and we just have to enjoy the good times when we can which hopefully will make us stronger to prepare us for those moments x

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  9. This is the advantage of aging...the wisdom that comes with it. I love how you share with us.
    XOXO
    Jodie

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  10. Life forces us to grow and stretch in ways we don't always want to, and learn lessons we didn't want to learn, but God must have a reason, and a purpose for us through all of it.

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  11. I seriously hate cliches, but I do believe in my heart that everything happens for a reason and works out exactly how it is meant to. I am glad you are figuring out who you are supposed to be, not what society expects you to be.

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  12. None of the rest of it works without that last part- getting to know yourself at God's hand.

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  13. I had to look up eschuca to see what it meant. It's such a blessing to feel peace, and to see the blessings in spite of the pain.

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  14. Even if we feel we are in one spot and can never seem to escape it, we still evolve and grow. Don't forget that. You are important and think how you have made a difference in so many lives. Even those that aren't family. Yes, some of us do feel we are stuck at the children's table on Thanksgiving, but I have to remember I enjoy being with those I'm surrounded, and I learn from them too even if I am grownup and yet a lot grownups I know don't think I'll ever grow up. Find the joy every day. Don't worry about that other stuff.

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  15. You have been through a very difficult time, and are triumphing with God on your side.
    You are beautiful just exactly how God made you, and sharing as you do is a blessing to us all. May He give you even better things than you ever dreamed or imagined for yourself
    Blessings
    Maxine

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  16. Love this, darling! I haven't reached any of the typical benchmarks either, and I'm okay with it! Getting to know the real you is all it's about :)

    xoxox,
    CC

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  17. You have expressed yourself beautifully here.

    ~Sheri

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  18. Thank you for baring your soul. So glad you have nieces and nephews to love. They are so lucky!

    https://www.kathrineeldridge.com

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  19. No one is perfect ~ no need to be perfect ~ just be the best you can be and that is great ~ Xo

    Wishing you good health, laughter and love in your days,
    A ShutterBug Explores,
    aka (A Creative Harbor)

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  20. So good to listen to what the Lord is telling you, there is nothing more satisfying than knowing that you are going in the path he has for you.

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