Stick

 A few of you have asked how the project is going. It’s going is all I can say. It’s harder than I can say. I feel the pressure to make it great. It’s a new genre for me. That is scary. So every day I write scared. Maybe if I keep doing it, it will become less scary. Right now I’m straddling two different themes in my writing, and it’s forcing me to stretch. So right now, this is writing looks like. Writing, then deleting. Repeat. Fighting my need for perfection. Fighting my own self-doubt. My writing journey resembles real life a little too succinctly. 

Writing is the one thing that can bring me joy, and yet have me let out ear-curdling screams. Again, this is mirroring my life right now. If you’re told life is now become easy and unicorn and rainbows, I need to visit you stat. My job title should read:  Regine:  the woman who complicated life while trying to simplify. I pull no punches. I’ve heard I need to give myself grace. It’s true, but so hard to do. I need a manual. A handbook on how to give myself what I so freely give to others. The Bible comes to mind. It always does. It seems like I have a hard time following instructions. 

God needs to spell it out like a child for me because if anyone can complicate God. Here I sit. And I’m writing this to you all. Because you’re my emotional support people. Giving tough love while being kind. So here is an update. I’m staring at a blank page praying something will stick.